Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Social Butterflies with tongue lashing capabilities.

Women are social butterflies. We have heard it before. Bloggers, chatters, phone talkers, Texters. Facebookers. We have to talk, gossip, chat, converse, state our opinion, stand on our soap box. Have long drawn-out conversations with a spouse that you probably have had over and over, saying the same sentence two hundred and ten times but must say it ONCE MORE to make a point. Our mouths have to move. But what if we had to go ONE day with no words? At what point would you lose your ability to be quiet?

I remember my mother when I would get in trouble, would have these LONG (hour and a half at least) conversations on behaving and making the right choices in life. They always took place at the kitchen table. I remember making the same eye rolling faces at her going on forever that my husband makes now when we are arguing and I go on forever.

So I am blogging to tell you this one thing. Steve and I were arguing. I wanted to know (for blogging purposes- I had to tell you my findings ok not really) what would happen if I didn't say a word. NOTHING. Just shut my yapper. So he states his issue, I state my complaint and then nothing. He said a couple more things that I wanted to lash out at. He looked at me as if I was broke. He paused looking at me in TOTAL confusion. He said, "WELL, aren't you going to say something?" I had my arms crossed and could tell my lips were pressed together so hard that they were white. I so bad wanted to yell something like "That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard what the hell were you thinking?" But decided not to. As hard as it was I turned and walked out of the bedroom. The next statement to fall from his mouth upon my departure was, "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU.... what should I have done instead?" I, (wow bad I know) found a tiny bit of satisfaction knowing that when we argue men use what we say as advise kind of. So he sat down on the couch and was quiet for a bit. Shortly after I hear this, "will you come and talk to me about this?" What easily WOULD have been an argument was able to be a conversation later just by holding my tongue. Hmmm. Seems pretty simple to do, but it soooo wasn't. How many marriages could have been saved or how many fights could kids have not been exposed to if one party (only one) had the ability to hold their tongue? I will admit it was so hard to do when you are so passionate about your feelings on the situation. I can't wait to try it with my teenagers. THAT will be even harder. :)

No comments:

Post a Comment